One of Many Ways to Leave a Church

This subject has been so strong on my heart lately. This is a very personal subject, and one that I can't help but share.

Did you know that there is more than one way to leave a church? Some people get offended, hurt and angry and then leave. That’s it! They just don’t come back to church anymore.

But some stay. They sit in the pew... offended, hurt and angry every week. They fill their spot in the pew and may even do their part to serve. But their love for the Lord's church and His people is as dead as it can get. This condition should be alarming at this point. Red flags should be flying and whistles should be sounding off!

Maybe you are here right now in this position. I know this is a real thing, because I've been here myself. I so regret those days in my life.

Years ago, I was hurt by some things that happened at our church. What I mean by that is... things happened… that I didn’t like. Somehow I thought I deserved better. I didn’t like what was happening to me. I justified my feelings by reminding myself of all the things I was doing at the church or of all the things that my husband was doing. I'm not just talking off the top of my head here. My husband was on the staff of our church for many years, so we were really busy in our church!

It was easy for me to say to myself, “Of course I love the church. It's our life. See... I'm here. I'm busy...”

But, hard testing times came. People didn’t seem to love us or appreciate us anymore. I became offended, and in my heart... I left the church. I don’t mean that I didn’t attend church anymore.
I mean, my heart was not in it anymore. I had lost my first love.

When you get like this, the devil has won. He loves to lie and distort situations because he hates the Lord's church! Do we really understand that? He uses what ever he can, to cause as much harm as possible. I hate to say it but... we are the ones that let Satan have free reign in our minds. We make the choice, to think the thoughts, that are provoked by the devil.

This is so clearly seen during times when we are hurt or offended. This is what happens.... When an offense happens, all of a sudden your mind says that everyone at church is your enemy. No one really loves you or appreciates you anymore.

The pastor’s wife only acts like she cares. It’s her job. She has to care about everybody! You start imagining things in your heart about what you think people are thinking about you. They may be real and they may not (mostly not), and the list goes on and on.

Does any of this sound familiar? Am I the only one who has ever thought this way? I think not.
If this is where you are at, let me tell you…there is hope. I remember years ago when I got sick of living this way, I started begging God to help me! I wanted out of this emotional bondage.

Psalm 139:23-24 “Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

These verses became the cry of my heart every day. They still are today because I never want to go back to that place of bitterness again. When I got serious about asking God to help me, the most amazing thing happened! He did! I learned that in the times when I come to God like I'm already cleaned up and every thing is ok with me, and I just kind of want to check in and say “hi”; He is not listening. I had to get real! I had to come to Him just as I was. In humility and honesty like the Bible says.

Psalm 51:17 “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.”

We heard this verse at church just yesterday. Our heart’s attitude is so critical! God already sees the condition of our heart. But He wants us to see what He sees!

Romans 7:13 “Was then that which is good made death unto me? God forbid. But sin, that it might appear sin, working death in me by that which is good; that sin by the commandment might become exceeding sinful.”

This is when real victory is won! I remember like it was yesterday, when it seemed to me that
God had pulled back the curtain of my heart and let me see the real me. I could not deny what I saw. The real me was the angry, bitter, offended person that I described earlier.

I have not been the same since that day!

I can hardly write this because of my tears. I am so thankful for what God did for me, in freeing me from this sinful emotional bondage. I sure didn’t deserve it, but He forgave me and He changed my heart completely!

Let me tell you how I really feel now….

My church owes me nothing. I am so unworthy to even have a church to come to. I'm unworthy to get to sit in a pew each week and listen to great preaching. I sure don’t deserve a pastor and pastor’s wife who will cry with me and pray with me when my heart is broken, and who will tell me when I'm headed down the wrong road. I am unworthy to get to serve in any way at all in the Lord’s church.

Do you see where I'm coming from? I am the one who owes…. I owe my whole life to Jesus. I am so unworthy. He is so worthy! He is our example.

I John 3:16 “Hereby perceive we the love of God, because he laid down his life for us: and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.”

This should be our heart’s attitude about the Lord’s church and God’s people. It's so easy to get
caught up in our feelings and let them be the dominating thing in our life, rather than the truth of God’s Word. I can not express that enough.

Have you left the church lately? Is your heart of love for God, His church, and God's people,
as fervent and real, as it once was? It can be.

Just cry out to the Lord in honest humility and ask Him to change you!

Psalm 51:10 “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.”

God is still forgiving sin and winning victories. He did it for me and I know He can do it for you.

There is a song that the Epley’s sang at one our family camps years ago. It rings in my heart today. Here are some words from that song….

"So Much the More"

As the darkness closes in on this world filled with sin.

Look around you, not many are left standing.

The Word of God has been compromised, holy living criticized, while iniquity on every hand is abounding.

So if you have a place to go where the old story’s told, and a man of God will preach the word with power;

Don't forsake it my friend as you’re nearing the end.

For it's the strength you need for this hour.

So much the more, as you see the day approaching.

So much the more, as his coming is at hand.

You need the church, the saints, and the worship of the Lord.

To stand faithful to the end…. so much the more.

From my heart....Dianne